I'm all out at sea - or up S**t Street without a paddle...
This is Scotland right? This is the land of hills o' green and wild blooming heather? This is where rain pours as fast as our whisky? Where "summer" is usually over a 3 day period sometimes randomly (well any time really) between June and September....
SOOOOO..what is going on? 43degreesC (110F) at my home the other day ..FORTY THREE! - Glorious, beautiful warm sunshine -
"TAPS AFF" is our saying. Our civilised society here are known for removing our tops at the very first hint of sun. As I drive through my local town - I see reddened backs and shoulders - fresh white freckled skin, frying in this crazy phenomenon.
It is indeed wonderful. A summer we will all remember. One which will go down in the history books of Scotland - 1976 I believe was our last sizzler - so for many, the first ever real heatwave they have experienced outside of their two week annual jaunt to foreign playgrounds.
I am scared to open my mouth - If the word gets out that I am the Jonah who is asking for the weather to cool it - I will be ousted. I will be cast out. There is no bigger sin here than condemning the heat..
But (oh yes I did say the "but" word) I need a cool studio... I struggle to work in the intense heat. I use heat tools and blow torches and all sorts of chemicals, which, are not given to work in a warm climate.
We don't have AC here. Why would we? We do have log burners, central heating, oil filled panels - oooh lots of lovely hot stuff to warm our wee tootsies.. AC? Nah, not on our shopping list.
I brought out my Cayman wardrobe this week !
Yes, I have a Cayman wardrobe. It lives in a deepened drawer, never to see the light of day until its time for me to do my Country/Glasgow/London/Nassau/Grand Cayman jaunt.
It lives there in the hope of being freed. Swimwear, rainbow bright wraps, aaaaaaaaah flip-flops - heaven to my feet. Cool summer linens and light airy shorts - bright colours that smile at me. Long summer evenings (but ugh the beasts - and you think "no seeums" are bad? I have clegg bites which are leaving potholes in my legs) Beautiful summer sunsets - my home is the idyllic country cottage dream. It truly is Scotland at its best. I should be lavishing the sunshine and topping up my tan.
I am very quietly (shhhhhhh) weaping inside - I want my studio routine. I need to paint. I need to create. I need to do my magic - its my mo-jo!
It is just over four weeks until my exhibition "Transatlantic" is launched. I have pieces to complete.
Think anyone will notice if we take this ship straight across the water from Dover to Cayman?
So, sizzled or not - I am braving the elements today (I really am NOT wishing for this glorious season to end, honestly - I DO jest!) and heading to my studio. I will conquer!
If I don't, I truly will be up S**T Street without a paddle and for sure, all out at Sea!!